Hello again. Remember, this is a safe place -- I am on Team You, OK? Take three deep breaths and rejoice in the pure optimism that every team feels in late April. Now please look at this image and tell me what you see.
What a Giants fan sees
Hey, that's my old high school principal Mr. Doofy. We loved him because he was so harmless -- even though he kept accidentally downloading malware onto the district server. The superintendent kept whiffing on hiring a replacement before finally landing the next-big-thing principal. They let ol' Doofy stick around for one last semi-embarrassing year. But then the new guy ended up being even worse. That's a whole other story ...
What the rest of the NFL sees
Oh boy, that's my friend Roy's 1986 Chrysler LeBaron, which he drove waaay too long. At senior week, he parked by the cars of 31 other kids and we were laughing at Roy's sad-sack jalopy -- the engine was leaking three kinds of fluids. Then the subwoofer in his back seat started to spark. But no matter how much we goofed on him, he kept yelling that his hunk of junk was an elite car!
* Check out Eli Manning vs. Daniel Jones when the Giants start OTAs on May 20.