| Sunday, February 13
By Frank Hughes Special to ESPN.com |
|
SAN FRANCISCO -- So I walk into the media interviews at the All-Star game
on Friday and I see Dale Davis sitting at a table and I think to myself: What
is he doing here?
He's not in that shamelessly publicized 2ball contest -- and the
question I have about that is if it such a good contest, and everybody loves
it so much, why do they not have it at the WNBA All-Star game and get NBA
stars to show up?
| | Indiana's Dale Davis is a nice rebounder, but not a big scorer. He's also an All-Star. |
I'll tell you why. Asking NBA players to take some time off in their
summers to promote the WNBA would go over like a pregnant high jumper.
But I digress.
Back to Davis. He's not in the dunk contest, I think to myself.
He's certainly not in any of the rookie games.
Yeah, there are always some pretty good All-Star weekend parties every
year, but then why would Davis be sitting at one of the round tables being
interviewed? Maybe he is a really good partier. Of course, being an NBA
player makes that a redundancy. However, I don't remember reading about him being
at any of the Super Bowl parties, at least not the ones Michael Jordan was at
when Wes Unseld was firing Gar Heard.
"He's in the All-Star game," one of my more knowledgeable colleagues --
which could be just about everybody -- tells me.
My mouth hangs open like the Arc De Triomphe.
Dale Davis. The one who used to be in Indiana? That Dale Davis? I mean,
he's got a perky game and all, but he has less moves than Whitney Houston --
and if you watch her closely enough, she is a really, really bad dancer; if
she didn't sing so well I might think she was tone deaf because her beat is,
well, beat. She snaps her fingers like she has epilepsy. I bet Marty Conlon
is better on the dance floor.
I mean, I knew the Eastern Conference was down this season, but I didn't
know it was, like, snake-belly low. (Hey, gimme a break, I've spent part of
the past week in Texas, that's how they talk down there.)
Dale Davis? That's what they've got to offer. I can name almost an entire
team in the Western Conference that should have been named ahead of Dale
Davis. In fact, I can name an entire team from the Westerners that didn't
make it to their squad that is better than the reserves in the Eastern
Conference that did make it.
Before I do that, though, I want to tell you about the one thing that I
want to see in this All-Star game. Somehow, Dikembe Mutombo from the Atlanta Hawks made the team -- which is another example of their desperation.
When the public address announcer introduces the starting lineups, I want
him to announce Mutombo's FULL name. "From the Atlanta Hawks, in his ninth
season, out of Georgetown, center Dikembe Mutombo Mpolondo Mukamba Jean
Jacque Wamutombo." NBC would have to go directly to a commercial break after that, then go back to the rest of the lineup -- which probably shouldn't be
announced anyway.
OK, they've got Dale Davis? I say Clifford Robinson of the Phoenix Suns is
more deserving. He became the oldest player in league history this season to
score 50 points for the first time in his career.
You say Glenn Robinson? I say Antonio McDyess, who is more versatile, more
athletic and a better defender. I liken Robinson's defense to that of the
French in World War II, and look what happened to them. In fact, that's why
they call Robinson the Big Dog, because on defense he just rolls over.
The East has Dikembe Mutombo Mpolondo Mukamba Jean Jacque Wamutombo? I'd rather have Arvydas Sabonis. Yes, at this point in his career he is older and
more feeble, but he still is a pretty good interior defender, and he
certainly is a much better passer and scorer than Dikembe Mutombo Mpolondo
Mukamba Jean Jacque Wamutombo. Plus, his team's record is just slightly
better.
Reggie Miller? Please. Shooting 44 percent, and with the capability to go
2-for-27 every fourth game, I'd rather have Glen Rice, without question. Yes,
Rice is having difficulty finding his way in Los Angeles, but the fact that he has to
go over, get two teammates to hold Kobe Bryant down, knock him over the head
with the microphone he was using in his video with Tyra Banks and rip the
ball from his hands just to get a shot, might have something to do with it.
Could you imagine Bryant as the quarterback of Nebraska's offense? He'd turn
it upfield every time.
Allan Houston is a political pick, because he is not even the best player
on his own team. Of course, the best player on his own team attempted to
(allegedly) murder his coach, so I guess I can understand that -- in the same way I can
understand why Hillary Clinton still is married to Bill. But I would still
venture to say that Lamar Odom already is better than any of those two guys
-- as well as Bill. I mean, this dude can flat-out play, and the fact that he
has slacked off lately has more to do with Donald Duck Sterling than it does
with Odom.
Sure, Ray Allen whupped up on some people in his movie, and he was given
the gift of being an Olympian instead of the more deserving Vince Carter, but
if you get him in a game of one-on-one with Penny Hardaway, I'd take
Hardaway. Yes, I know all the criticisms of Hardaway, and I fully agree, but
if you are going for pure talent, and that includes defense, Hardaway is my
choice. (That's mostly because the All-Star team is only for a weekend, and
Hardaway can neither get the coach fired nor undermine the chemistry of the
team for his own selfish benefit. Or maybe he could, but we'll never know
this year.)
Jerry Stackhouse finally made his first All-Star game. If he were in the
West, he'd still be waiting. Steve Francis is a much better talent, even in
his rookie season. The Rockets would be nowhere near what they are right now
without him.
The only player that I would keep on the Eastern team reserves is Nets
point guard Stephon Marbury.
Oh wait, he's not on it.
Frank Hughes covers the NBA for the Tacoma (Wash.) News-Tribune. He is a regular contributor to ESPN.com. | |