The NFL draft, OTAs and free-agent signings get most of the attention in the long NFL offseason that stretches from the Super Bowl to the start of training camps. But no offseason tradition is as grand as that of NFL players and coaches making ridiculous statements about the upcoming season.
Although this year we didn't have any backup Philadelphia Eagles quarterbacks declaring a "dynasty" or Carolina Panthers offensive linemen taking out Super Bowl ads in the newspaper, we still have some strong headline-grabbing quote contenders.
Take a look and vote for your favorite.
When did he say this? July 25, 2013
Why did he say this? He apparently is very excited about the potential of Washington's offense.
How insane is this statement? Semi-insane. Best offense ever? Washington had only the fourth-best offense of 2012, which is just one single year out of "ever," averaging 27.2 points per game. The most prolific offense ever is the 1950 Rams, who averaged 38.3 points per game – meaning Garcon and friends would have to improve by more than a touchdown, extra point and field goal per game to match them. The team's primary addition to the offense this year is Donte Stallworth, who caught one NFL pass a year ago. So, yeah, he's probably not enough to account for the 11 additional points per game they'll need to equal the 1950 Rams. And let's just ignore RG3's potential for reinjury because that's depressing.
But could they have the best offense? Sure! Who's to say the "best offense ever" has to score more than any other offense ever? Maybe the best offense ever is just a good offense with great self-esteem that refuses to listen to the "haters" who might throw statistics and facts at it. The definition of "best" can be whatever you want it to be. Plus, Stallworth is probably good for more than one catch this year. Watch out.
When did he say this? July 31, 2013
Why did he say this? Your guess is as good as mine. But it's probably because he wanted to let Smith know that he has the full support of the coaching staff, unlike in San Francisco. He just, you know, overshot a little bit.
How insane is this statement? Just completely. Smith was seventh in Total QBR in 2012, his seventh season in the NFL. He has never led the NFL in a major statistical category. Ah! But stats don't tell the whole story of a quarterback, you say. What about rings? OK, fine. Let me check.
I checked. He has none of those.
But could he be the best in the league? I guess. Joe Flacco can be "elite." Smith can be the "best in the league." Let's just give every starting quarterback in the NFL a title that makes them feel special. (Congratulations to Kevin Kolb on being a "true professional!") And in fairness, if we just take the first part of Pederson's quote, he is onto something. Ultimately, every team does have to have a quarterback. That's 100 percent true. Try to deny it. You can't.
When did he say this? April 2, 2013
Why did he say this? His tiny hat was squeezing his head too tight, restricting blood flow to his brain. It's a theory, at least.
How insane is this statement? Remarkably. These are the people found in Arizona's quarterback room: Carson Palmer, noted turnover specialist; Drew Stanton, a 29-year-old who has four career NFL starts; and Ryan Lindley, a quarterback Arians recently compared - favorably! - to Kelly Holcomb.
But could they have the strongest quarterback room? It's possible. Maybe Arians was being literal. Carson Palmer is about 6-foot-5, 235 pounds. A guy that big can probably lift a lot. And if Stanton and Lindley put time in the weight room, maybe the Cardinals could beat any other team's quarterbacks in a feats-of-strength competition, should such a competition be held. However, if Arians wasn't being literal, his comment seems fairly insane. I mean, how do you rate Arizona's quarterback room ahead of Kansas City's? The Chiefs have the best quarterback in the league!
When did he say this? March 29, 2013
Why did he say this? Because a Cowboys offseason doesn't officially happen unless someone in the organization makes a huge prediction.
How insane is this statement? Semi-insane. No receiver in NFL history has reached 2,000 yards in a season. Detroit's Calvin Johnson got 1,964 last year, but he scored only 5 touchdowns. (Note: I'm still not sure how he had only five touchdowns, but whatever.) And only two receivers in NFL history - Jerry Rice in 1987 and Randy Moss in 2007 - eclipsed 20 receiving touchdowns in a season. So hitting 2,000 yards and 20 TDs in one season would be pretty tough … especially considering Bryant's career bests are 1,382 yards and 12 TDs.
But could he do it? It's not impossible. No one has ever doubted Bryant's talent or potential. You just fear that, in Week 17, he would be wide open in the end zone, 1 yard and one TD from 2,000/20, and Tony Romo would lob the ball directly into the stomach of a defensive lineman as the final seconds tick away.