No one in the history of world athletics has made throwing a javelin outrageous distances look as casual as Arshad Nadeem. It works like this: he's out for an evening jog in a regular looking tracksuit and sleeveless tee, sees a stick, and, continuing at the slightly bored looking pace of the jog, throws said stick into the air and just stands there frowning at it.
On a balmy Paris evening on Thursday, he came out for that casual jog of his and hurled a javelin 92.97m. Olympic record smashed. Pakistan's first ever individual gold medal. As you were, bhai. Now, where's the chai?
The distance, the technique, the improbability of it all took the breath away.
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While the world collected their collective jaws off the floor, his great friend from across the border, Neeraj Chopra, came in soon after him and flung the javelin the second farthest he's ever done. 89.45m.
'You chase greatness?," he seemed to say, "I'll chase you down... at least try my damnedest to.'
An Olympic javelin final that had, after the qualifications, threatened to become great, entered legendary territory, and it was being pushed there by two South Asians.
They are vastly different in technique - Neeraj all latent velocity exploding out of a coiled spring vs Nadeem's bull-like shoulders extracting pure power by sheer dint of size - and in competitive success (before Paris, Nadeem had never beaten Neeraj). Where Neeraj is consistency personified, there are few elite athletes who fluctuate more than Nadeem. And their support systems are worlds apart: Neeraj has an elite machine behind him, Nadeem had to borrow money from fellow villagers to fund his early training and continues to struggle for funding.
The two nonetheless have something fundamental in common -- before they emerged on the scene, no one had even imagined an Indian and Pakistani could do what they are doing right now: owning world-level track and field events.
And this was some event that they took charge of. The throw that got Julius Yego fifth in Paris, 87.72m, would have won him gold in Tokyo. In 2022, Anderson Peters (who took bronze here) had told this writer, "For me, in all of javelin history, this is the best crop of throwers ever," and they proved it here. The top five throws read: 92.97m, 89.45m, 88.45m, 88.50m and that 87.72m. The Olympic Games has rarely seen a grouping this tight, this high up on the scale.
As close as the competition was though, it was somehow all about Nadeem vs Neeraj. And also, Nadeem and Neeraj.
There was this picture of them at the 2018 Asian Games, heads together, flags around each other, that had an iconic quality to it -- but neither the man who clicked it nor those who first saw it could possibly have predicted where they were both headed.
Between 2018 and 2021 the rivalry wasn't particularly close on the field, but Nadeem kept within touching distance of Neeraj. After his history-making exploits at the Tokyo Olympics, Neeraj had said, "I had at the time said that it is great that we both reached the final. Very rarely do you get Asian throwers performing like this." At the time he'd also gone to great lengths to shut down toxic, and volatile, rumours spreading against Nadeem in the Indian online space. This is something he's often rushed to do since: play down the enmity of the nations, highlight the base one-ness of it all.
In 2022, Nadeem won Commonwealth gold in the absence of Neeraj with a monster throw of 90.18m, and told reporters that he missed his friend in Birmingham. "We're going to have a lot of fun in the next competitions [between us]."
And oh, have they had fun. After finishing 1-2 in the 2023 World Championships, Nadeem had said he'd like a repeat of it at the Paris Olympics. Nadeem's got his wish. It was India-Pakistan at the Worlds; it would be Pakistan-India at the Olympics. Win, win for the subcontinent.
This is a rivalry that both take great pride in. It's intense -- neither like losing one bit (exhibit A: Neeraj's face through this final) but somehow, they are also able to see the big picture.
After the World Championship 1-2, for instance, Neeraj's mother had shut down a provocative India vs Pakistan question with a simple "Look, once you're on the field, everyone's a sportsperson...It is a matter of great happiness that the one from Pakistan could have won, it was a great happiness"
On Thursday night, she stepped up to sum it all up in the best manner possible, as she said one of the loveliest lines you'll ever hear: "I am happy with the silver, [Arshad Nadeem] is also my child, everyone goes there after doing a lot of hard work."
The final would remain tense till the end, but with Neeraj pushing himself to the limit to catch Nadeem, he'd foul out the next four times, once flinging the javelin so hard he flew over the line with it. Silver it would be, the first Indian to ever win gold and silver in an individual event, the fourth ever to win multiple individual ones.
Nadeem, meanwhile, has taken Pakistani sport to a place it's never seen before. At the end of the competition, on the final throw, he would remain calm and jog out to smash a 91.79m: as if it put an extra little bit of oomph on a record-breaking, history-making night.
Nadeem vs Neeraj. Neeraj and Nadeem. Ain't nothing like it in world sport.