Leyton Orient are in the market for a new midfield terrier this summer, particularly one adept in man-marking opposing foxes out of the game.
The O's put out a desperate plea on Twitter asking for a local fan with a male dog to come to their aid and help the National League side deal with a pest problem at Brisbane Road.
🐕 NEWS: A bit of a weird one we know, but we're looking for a local supporter who is willing to walk their *male* dog around the O's pitch this week to help deal with a fox problem.
— Leyton Orient (@leytonorientfc) 23 July 2018
Full story 👉 https://t.co/JCluM0Tz9v#LOFC #OnlyOneOrient pic.twitter.com/ym5QPEFPI4
Dogs applying now... #LOFC pic.twitter.com/RCHhGKbvkP
— Leyton Orient (@leytonorientfc) 23 July 2018
"The club have been having issues with foxes entering the playing surface at night and it is thought a dog's presence will help prevent further pitch invasions," Orient said in their accompanying statement.
Cue roughly 1,000 identical "fox in the box" jokes being made simultaneously.
Oh, the joys of non-league football!